Sunday, February 04, 2007

Overused sayings I Never Want to Hear Again

"True that."
No hip-hop expression, with the possible exceptions of "It's all about the Benjamins" and the "-izzle" suffix, has ever been more co-opted than this one. Please, please, stop.

"It is what it is."
For once I'd like someone to say "it isn't what it is."

"Good times."
This originated from the Alec Baldwin Schwetty Balls segment on Saturday Night Live a decade ago. You know what would really signify good times? If people stopped saying "good times."

"It happens."
Yeah, obviously it happens, otherwise it wouldn't have happened. Go kill yourself.

"from hell" and "on steroids"
"From hell" is an overused expression that fills me not only with anger, but anger on steroids. And not just any steroids, mind you - steroids from hell.

"It's not you, it's me."
Along with "I love you, but I'm not in love with you," this meaningless sentence is a weaker substitute for "I hate you. Don't ever talk to me again unless you'd like to find yourself on the business end of a restraining order."

"Listen, ..."
No one ever starts a sentence with "listen" unless they're either a guidance counselor or a character in a movie or TV show. Where do screenwriters and guidance counselors get this word? And why do people take career advice from guidance counselors? Do you think when they were 16 they wanted to grow up to be guidance counselors?

This word is a stand-in for telling people to go screw themselves. Even worse is the response, "Yeah, right whatever!"

"Show me the money."
How about I show you my bootprint on your face.

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