Sunday, January 04, 2009

Businesses I hope the recession will destroy

Exxon - Revenge for the oil spill.

Chase - So the Diamondbacks' home field has to change its name again.

The University of Phoenix - Same reason as Chase, only for the Cardinals' stadium.

McDonald's - So Burger King an finally ascend from princedom to the throne.

Michael's - So my wife is no longer tempted to blow our bank account in its aisles.

The Dallas Cowboys - Because I hate them.

Apple - Because I can't afford an iPhone and am jealous of those that can.

The Big Three - Because the journalism industry isn't getting a bailout and I'm bitter.

Twitter, Facebook and MySpace - Because social networking is annoying and needs to go. The presence of MySpace here is redundant because it would be toast even in a boom economy.

Arizona State University - Without ASU NAU and U of A could split the state funds and grow stronger.

Toyota - The Saved By Zero commercials. I realize Toyota heard the criticism and ditched the ad campaign, but it was a mortal sin. No absolution.

Geico - So I stop getting all their junk mail.

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