Those who know me well might question why I left U2 off my list of 10 Types of People Who Just Need to Stop. They might wonder whether I've softened in my stance about U2 music being wretched dog excrement, or if I was simply forgetful.
The omission does deserve some clarification, so onward. The reason U2 did not make the list is because I refuse to grant them more popularity by referencing them with the noble distinction of being included on my list. The notoriety could get to their heads, and let's face it, if there's anyone who doesn't need yet another reason to be conceited it's U2.
You might scoff at this maneuver given the fact that I'm devoting an entire post to them here, but you'd be overlooking the fact that this is a SECRET post which I intend for nobody but my utmost obsessive stalkers to read.
I will not post a link to this on Twitter and Facebook as I do my other posts. I will not beg coworkers and family members to read it, as I often do, and I most certainly will not talk about this post in casual conversation. Sure, it will go on Google Reader -- you can neither stop Google Reader nor even hope to contain it -- but last I check I only had like 4 subscribers, so I think my secret's safe there.
If you have stumbled onto this post, you are most likely a member of the FBI in charge of reading everything posted on the internet. So I say to you, good sir or madam, I am confident that since you are a man or woman of refined musical taste such as mine, and thus despise U2 just as much as I do. So top of the day to you and good luck on your further reading for the day.
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