1. Dallas Cowboys. It's no coincidence all those Satanic ritual movies have the Cowboys' logo with a circle around it. Having the gall to call yourself "America's Team" gets you to to the top of this list right quick.
2. Green Bay Packers. They win too often, and their stupid Lambeau leap is obnoxious.
3. New England Patriots. They never ever ever lose. Well, sometimes they do. They are the football version of entitled, smarmy Duke basketball.
4. Pittsburgh Steelers. They are always mediocre yet nearly always worm their way into the late rounds of the playoffs and sometimes even swipe Super Bowl titles.
5. Seattle Seahawks. It's impossible to take anything sportswise from Seattle seriously, yet I still hate the Seahawks because of their obnoxious color scheme and ability to pull out undeserved wins with semi-regularity.