How To Install A New Thermostat

Electrical things attached to your wall tend to be intimidating to neophyte do-it-yourselfers, especially if the apparatus controls the temperature of your home. But before you call in a pro to install a new thermostat, it's worth taking a crack at the operation yourself.

The Penny Frugalista explains how she tackled the project. Here are some key steps:

* Do a lot of unscrewing. Every model is different, but be prepared to detach it piece by piece. Says the writer, "there were a lot of screws."

* Remember which wires go where. Your thermostat won't do you much good if it's not connected. Note which wires are attached and where, and find the corresponding parts on your new thermostat.

* Fill in the holes. A new thermostat installation kit may require new screws in different places, so use some putty to fill in the old holes before you mount the new unit.

Fix-It Friday: Installing a Digital Thermostat [The Penny Frugalista]

Use Hemorrhoid Cream To Battle Dark Circles Under Your Eyes

If you've got an interview or presentation to give, it can be daunting to stare into the mirror and notice that your eyes are puffy or accompanied by dark circles. A popular, if scientifically unproven, home remedy for the condition is to apply hemorrhoid cream to the area around your peepers.

While noting there's no evidence that the treatment works for everyone, as well as the fact that hemorrhoid cream is not meant for the face, a 2010 Livestrong post walks you through the process of using the cream to make yourself look perkier.

You start by washing your face, then blot it dry and apply the cream to the area. The idea is that the cream will shrink the swollen tissue causing the eye issues. A doctor quoted in the piece recommends trying it only once or twice a week.

How To Use Preparation H For Dark Circles [Livestrong]

Cut Down On Your Toilet's Water Usage With This Trick

There's a simple, less disgusting way to cut down on your toilet's water usage than urinating in your backyard or employing the "if it's pee, let it be; if it's brown, flush it down" maxim. If you place something heavy and non-obstructive in your tank, the object will take up volume and require your toilet to send less water to raise the level to its setting.

Water bottles filled with sand or something else that won't float will do the trick. When you're just starting out, monitor the flush from beginning to end to make sure your object isn't blocking your flushing mechanism, otherwise you may be doing more harm than good.

If you drop something into your toilet tank, be sure not to use something that will disintegrate and harm your pipes.

5 Inventive Meals To Make Out Of Beans And Rice

As far as stock foods go, it's tough to find cheaper, relatively healthier staples than beans and rice. While the thought of eating either as side dishes isn't very exciting, creative cooks can combine the two into interesting meals.

WiseBread offers these dishes you can craft from beans and rice:

* Korean pancakes. These gluten-free munchies work well as a snack or main dish.

* Soup. Pintos and brown rice meld together nicely in slurpable form.

* Burrito bowls. Cut those carb-toting tortillas out of the equation to enjoy the innards of your burrito without a wrap.

* Salad. Here's a recipe for a salsa, black beans and rice salad. Salsa can make boring things taste spectacular.

* Sticky rice balls. Beans go well with this Thai recipe for sticky rice balls, which just begs for a Saturday Night Live NPR parody featuring Alec Baldwin.

25 Tasty Ways to Enjoy Beans and Rice [WiseBread]

So Over Debt reviews SOASS

Many thanks to Andrea of So Over Debt for this review. Here's an excerpt:

I may be giving Phil too much credit here, but I found some poignant observations and truths in Stingy Scoundrel. First, like those funny product warning labels, these tips couldn’t exist unless someone actually tried them. I want to be shocked that people would go to such ridiculous lengths to save money, but I live in a rural town – I could probably see most of these in action on a trip to Walmart, if I paid attention.

Foods That Go Well With Workouts

Working out on a full stomach usually isn't a good idea. Nausea, cramping and lethargy can drag your exercise routine down. Be selective about how you fuel up and your workouts will be more energetic and enjoyable.

Tabbing recommendations from a few different publications, Everyday Health lays out some rules of thumb for eating and drinking before, during and after exercise.

Here are a few takeaways:

* Unless you're going on a workout longer than two hours, you don't need to eat while you exercise.

* If you do exercise for such long stretches, energy gels and fuel snacks are good bets. Light, glucose-rich foods can keep your stamina high.

* Good pre-workout snacks include carbohydrates that are easy to digest. Bananas are an excellent choice.

* Water is always your friend. When in doubt, use it instead of expensive, caloric sports and energy drinks. If you're going to eat a heavy meal, save it for after your workout.

What to Eat Before, During and After Your Workout [Everyday Health]

The 5 Worst Places To Find Hair On Your Body

1. Ears. It makes you feel like Bald Bull.

2. Toes. It makes you feel like a Hobbit.

3. Shoulders. It makes you feel like the guy in Dirty Work who steals Norm Macdonald's shirt.

4. Back. At least you don't have to look at it, but when you turn to the side in the mirror it makes you look like a razorback pig.

5. The back of your neck. It grows in too quickly after haircuts, making you look scruffy.

Top 5 Annoying Fake Voices In Which People Talk

1. Little kid voice — Parents are incapable of talking to tiny children without distorting their tone into the singsong manner they used on them when they were babies. People should start using their regular voice when communicating with kids, because it's funnier.

2. Dog voice — People address their dogs like they are not only babies but idiots. Which I guess they kind of are, so maybe I ranked this one too high.

3. Girlfriend voice — When a bro answers the phone around other bros and his lady calls, he talks unnaturally softly and timidly.

4. Wuvvy duvvy voice — People who are in high school or college who think they're in love do this. It wears off once one catches the other cheating and they become bitter like the rest of us.

5. Professional voice — It's unnaturally deep and distant. Almost butler-y and overly defensive.

Careful Cents Reviews SOASS

Big thanks to Carrie at Careful Cents who reviewed my book. Here's an excerpt:

Phil, the author, presents the book in a sarcastic tone but with real tips and money sense behind them.
He walks to fine line of moral decency and warns not to cross over into doing something illegal. But shy of that, have at it!

Clean Your Oven Without Oven Cleaners

Unless you rigorously wipe down the inside of your oven after it's cooled off following each meal, you're bound to end up with charred food crust that can stink up your kitchen. A more manageable plan is to clean the oven after every few uses -- maybe every week or month, depending on how often you use it.

Mother Nature Network tells you how to do the chore without relying on chemical-heavy cleaning sprays. You can whip up your own cleaning concoctions with ingredients such as baking soda, lemon juice and vinegar. For tough grease stains, opt for dish soap, a sponge and elbow grease. The article recommends using a self-cleaning option sparingly, because it uses a lot of energy.

In order to make the job easier, place crumbly dishes on cookie sheets to prevent spillage. And disobey instructions on frozen pizzas that command you to place them directly on the rack, opting for the pan-cooking alternatives when available.

How to clean an oven naturally [Mother Nature Network]

Shows I Watch

Here are the shows I watch and consider myself an expert on, alphabetically:

The Big Bang Theory
Breaking Bad
Californication
Community
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Family Guy
Glee
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
The League
The Life and Times of Tim
Mad Men
Napoleon Dynamite
New Girl
The Office
The Simpsons
Sons of Anarchy
30 Rock
Weeds
Wilfred

These are shows I watch casually, don't have much expertise on but could still write about:
Game of Thrones
Justified
True Blood
The Walking Dead

Supreme Court Will Rule On Affirmative Action In Colleges

In a case that will likely have ripple effects across this country's higher education system, the U.S. Supreme Court will hear a case brought by a Texas student who contends that ethnicity-based affirmative action kept her out of the University of Texas. The university uses ethnicity as a factor in admitting a quarter of its applicants, with underrepresented minorities given an edge over others. The student sued because she thought she would have been admitted had ethnicity not been a factor because her grades were better than many candidates who were admitted.

According to the L.A. Times, the case could possibly end affirmative action at public colleges. Many states, including California, no longer allow such policies. UT, however, is out to preserve its admissions process. Its president told the paper "The university is firmly committed to a holistic admissions policy that is narrowly tailored to achieve the educational benefits of a diverse student body."

The issue is a contentious one, with vigorous arguments on both sides, but I think it's tough to rationalize basing admission standards on anything but merit. If there's any segment that's underrepresented and worthy of preferential treatment, it's economically disadvantaged students who lack the resources and connections of their wealthier counterparts. Skin color and heritage should not be a plus or minus on a college application.

Supreme Court to consider affirmative action in higher education [L.A. Times]

Things I've Given Up For Lent, Back When I Did That

1. Chips.

2. Soda.

3. Chocolate.

4. Video games.

5. TV.

I'm fairly certain I didn't pull off any of these. I was a decisive failure at Lent.

The 5 Dumbest Holidays

1. Earth Day. Every day is Earth Day. We do so much for the earth every day -- we kill all those annoying trees that are always growing out of it, relieve it of those pesky oil reserves and warm it up by getting rid of those obnoxious ice caps -- and all it does is thank us by whining and demanding its own holiday.

2. Arbor Day. You don't see chainsaws and napalm demanding their own days, do you? By granting trees this elite status we're simply playing favorites. Also, the word "arbor" is stupid. If this were known as "Tree Day and By The Way Napalm Sucks," I would move it down a few spots.

3. Presidents Day. This day does not represent an actual important date in history. It's just a median point between two president's birthdays, and a sign that the holiday makers are too indecisive to pick the better president and go with his birthday as the day we don't get mail or garbage pickup.

4. Groundhog Day. If not for the amazingly great movie based on this holiday, this list wouldn't exist because the day is by far stupider than all other holidays combined. But because of that movie, there's not only a list but this day doesn't even top it, and has fallen all the way down to number four. See what a good job you did, Bill Murray?

5. Boxing Day. Although most people think it's actually the national anthem, the song "Oh, Canada" is actually a coded, sarcastic rebuke to the country's silliness for having goofy holidays such as this, as well as its own Thanksgiving.

Daily Money Shot (And Money Crashers) Reviews Secrets of a Stingy Scoundrel

Daily Money Shot -- excellent blog title there -- reviewed Secrets of a Stingy Scoundrel last week.

Here's an excerpt:

Just beneath the surface of the sarcasm are actually some pretty good tips. But the way it’s presented provides a sort of caution against being so cheap you actually come across like an ass. No one should ever place money and frugality above ethics, morality and basic common decency. It is possible to take frugality too far, as the book points out in a humorous way, but it’s also possible to be careful with your money.

Update: Money Crashers also checked in with a review.

The Top 5 Reasons The Hunger Games Is Bullshit

1. The concept is ludicrous. No matter how deranged people get in the future, they'll never think it's cool to watch 12-year-olds claw each others' eyes out for entertainment value. And they certainly wouldn't think it's cool to watch 16-year-olds massacre 12-year-olds. If the competition's minimum age was 16 the story would have been less forcefully melodramatic and more believable.

2. "Katniss" is a stupid name. And now these books are probably inspiring others to name their daughters that, making our world more annoying and unlivable.

3. The writing is distractingly choppy, with horrible transitions between scenes.

4. Its biggest calling card is that it's "better than Twilight." So is dog excrement.

5. Too many people like it.

The 5 Game Systems I've Played The Least Yet Still Own

1. GameBoy Micro -- A little while before Nintendo release the DSi, it came out with a miniature GameBoy Advance. This thing is so small that I once accidentally washed and dried it with my clothes. Somehow it still works.

2. RetroN 3 -- Plays NES, SNES and Genesis games. Problem is, so does the Wii, which made me re-purchase and download just about every game I had for those consoles and still care about years before the RetroN came out.

3. IXL -- It's a book-shaped system with kids' games with a terribly unresponsive stylists. My kids hate it and it gets buried underneath a pile of Leapster Explorers and LeapPads, but I feel too bad for it to get rid of it.

4. iPod Touch -- I admire its capabilities and its pocket-friendliness, but I just never have a use for this thing. The games are OK and free and it plays movies, but there are always better alternatives available.

5. PSP -- The Vita has rendered this thing obsolete, but the PSP never really was the cutting edge of anything. Instead it was a promising misfit that spent all its time beneath the bleachers, got tatted up and did too many drugs.

Review: Safe House

Safe House plays out just like a romantic comedy, only with slightly more explosions, car chases, hand-cuffings, ear-yankings and stabbings with glass shards.

You know how it goes. The leads meet cute, maybe at a park bench or perhaps in an interrogation room in South Africa. They vow to spend most of the rest of the movie together, either because they’ve found true love or because one is constantly pointing a gun at the other’s pancreas. Then comes the inevitable misunderstanding that separates them, which can be maybe an unwelcome visit from an ex or an orchestrated diversion complete with disguises and an orchestrated cover story provided by the international media.

This breathless bromance, which arrives just in time for Valentine’s Day, pairs People’s Sexiest Man Alive 1996 Denzel Washington with Sexiest Man Alive 2010 Ryan Reynolds.  Sure, they may rough-house and insult one another a bit – after all, Washington plays a suspected double agent on the loose with sensitive material and Reynolds is the greenhorn CIA agent sent to track him down – but deep down, you just know they really, really like each other in the same way grabby UFC fighters seem to when they’re writhing around on the ground.

The non-romantic element of attraction is certainly there. Reynolds knows Washington is a bad boy, but he’s convinced he can change him in ways that waterboarding could not. In turn, Washington wants Reynolds to come out of his patriotic shell and live a little.

Just as in all romantic comedies, there are more than a few ridiculous leaps of faith you’re asked to make in order to buy the charade. For instance, it’s tough to buy that the consortium of Western spy networks couldn’t capture Washington for years, yet Reynolds gets him back in his grasp with the ease he delivered one-liners on the show Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place, a great show which is inexplicably still not available on DVD. Ahem. But back to the review.

Also, Washington’s fighting skills are a bit exaggerated and bizarrely unbalanced. He can take down a room of highly-trained agents with ease, and break out of a car trunk, take control of a vehicle and survive a rollover crash, yet is powerless when a rookie agent cuffs him to a wall.

Despite all the silliness, or perhaps because of it, Safe House stays interesting as it shepherds you through genuinely surprising twists, brutal fisticuffs and some plotting every bit as clever as MAD magazine’s recurring Spy vs. Spy feature.

You can probably find a better way to spend a pre-Valentine’s weekend night, even if you’re alone and just flipping through channels on TV. But one thing’s for certain. You sure as heck won’t be able to find Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place on, because the world hates you and refuses to ever let you see that  show again.

Starring Denzel Washington, Ryan Reynolds, Vera Farmiga, Robert Patrick, Sam Shepard and Brendan Gleeson. Written by David Guggenheim. Directed by Daniel Espinosa. Rated R. 115 minutes. 

My novel, Stormin' Mormon, is available as a Kindle book for $1.

The 5 Funniest Super Bowl Scores

1. XXIV: 49ers 55, Broncos 10

2. XLII: Giants 17, Patriots 14

3. XLVI: Giants 21, Patriots 17

4. XX: Bears 46, Patriots 10

5. III: Jets 16, Colts 7

My Favorite Financial Tip

Is included on page 5 of this MainStreet post. It was an honor to be included with this awesome group of money masters.